I already have so many failings, and yet, dear reader, it seems that I must add another. I am a fraud. It all started when I went on a course last week. I didn’t arrive with the deliberate intention to deceive and yet, by the end of the week, I seemed to have accidentally created a wholly different persona. The persona of someone who is much nicer.
All my friends, those who love me most and know me best, know that I am acerbic (which really just a polite way of saying ‘critical’) and challenging (‘opinionated’). And yet, over the course of three days, I managed to convince six strangers that I am a caring and considerate human being.
I blame the tutor. From the outset she had a warmth and openness that was beguiling. I loved her eclectic sense of style, big hair, and up-tempo vibe. I was like a moth to her flame. And then there were the other people on the course. Women with stories to tell, women with guts and determination, women who listened – properly listened – to what others were saying. (There was due to be a man on the course, but he was a ‘no show’).
Everyone was so kind, so supportive, that it made me want to be, well, kind and supportive. And so it happened. I started listening to what people were saying. And the more I listened, the more respect I had for them, these women of different ages and different backgrounds. I saw how special they were (are!). And I wanted them to feel as nurtured and supported as I did. And there it was. Just like that I had accidentally become a nicer person.
I’m not saying it will last – I still need to keep my husband on his toes – but maybe I will keep just a little bit of my new persona. It’s a shame to spend all that money on a course and only have learnt about journalism, when what you could have done is learnt about yourself.
I went on the lifestyle journalism course run by the London School of Journalism, and would like to thank Lorna V (the tutor) and everyone on the course for all it has given me. #GroupHug